Ephesians 5:33b: And the wife should respect her husband.
Respect is his primary need, his deepest desire.

I Put My Followers First

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Topsy Turvy Thank You

Word to the Wives ~ ~ Regardless of how capable or willing you may be, God placed your husband in the leadership role in your house. It is up to you, as wife and nurturer, to assure that his leadership is not a thankless job.
When I was in the hospital recovering from my stroke, I discovered a "trick" that turned my trials upside down.  I began to use gratitude to my advantage.

I studied my predicament a lot as I lay in the ICU.  My world had been turned upside down but I was so grateful to be alive.  Do you know that it becomes impossible to fret, worry and despair when counting blessings?  It was absolutely amazing.
Topsy Turvy Thank You card
Topsy Turvy Thank You by Your Husband's Deepest Desire

What does that have to do with acknowledging, accepting and appreciating your husband's role as leader in your home?  Probably a lot more than you think.

Are you annoyed with God for making the husband the leader?  Are you offended that the wife is to be subject to the husband?  I know I was.

It has only been the recent couple of years that I have turned my thinking on that subject inside out and upside down.

While I was thanking God for saving my life, I realized that I owed Him the greatest measure of gratitude for my husband.  As I lay in that bed and considered the man I was coupled with, I began to realize the immense trust God had placed in each of us.

God trusts my husband - in spite of his obvious deficiencies - to lead me on the strait and narrow path.  God trusts me to stand in support of my husband as he becomes the man God designed him to be.  

OH NO!  

From the day I married my husband, I had defied God's command by getting in my husband's way and taking charge.  My behavior guaranteed that he was unable to lead us as a couple.  And, being the loving husband that he is, he didn't want to upset me by taking that job away from me.  Who knows? He probably wasn't overly eager to do what I was obviously willing to do.

I realized that as long as I continued to usurp my husband's authority, I was thwarting the work of God.

As low as $2.50 on a Note Card
And worse - I was horrified to realize that any effort to thwart the work of God was the work of the devil.

I realized that I was not working for the Lord - I was working against him.   

It was imperative that I learn - and learn quickly - how to step back and urge my husband to take the lead.  My biggest challenge was going to be getting me out of the way so my husband felt there was a place to step into.  And I would need to encourage and welcome him to take my place.

I am so grateful that God gave me an active imagination.  I began to dream up ways to push my husband out in front and created ways for me to step back a little.

I found ways to change my leadership skills into cheerleading skills.  

Most of all, I learned to thank my husband for every little piece of leadership he successfully gained away from me.  I even thanked him in advance - grateful for his desire to be all that God wants him to be - and not waiting for him to achieve it.   

Those expressions of gratitude were also my way of telling myself to let go of the reins.

I am grateful to a patient God and a patient husband.  I've learned that my world does not turn upside down when I get out of the way and let them do what they were meant to do.

~ ~ ~

If you're interested in seeing other Thankful Thursday posts
or would like to check out the host site, please click here


Denise said...

Beautiful, beautiful post.

beemii said...

Wow, what an amazing post, so glad I found you on Thankful Thrusday!!!!


Crystal said...

Thank you so much for stopping by & your kind, kind words. I enjoyed your post immensely as I have a very hard time stepping back and allowing my husband to take the reigns. And it isn't something a lot of people talk about - they tend to ignore certain parts of God's Word & that's one of those little parts we ignore and don't like to focus on in this day and age. I'm so glad you stopped by & I've found you, because the entire purpose of your blog here is something I need help with =)

Tylaine said...

Boy I sure wish I had your attitude. Excellent post.

Karen said...

I need to do more of that cheerleading myself...thank you for the wise words...

Rocks said...

and I am grateful i found this blog too! To tell you honestly..I am in the midst of that..stepping back and giving way to my dear husband..so thankful indeed that I've read this..very timely.

Serendipity said...

Thank you for sharing such an inspiring post. I'm glad to have stopped by here. Many blessings to you!

Doreen McGettigan said...

Very inspirational post. I love the cards and will just have to be your newest customer. I am a writer but I do have such a hard time choosing cards for my husband.
I am a new visitor and follower!

Charla @ Healthy Home Blog said...

You have a wonderful blog here. This post reminds me of Philippians 4:4-7. Having an attitude of thankfulness to God really does make a difference!
And respecting our husbands as God intended, not saying "no" to lovemaking except for sickness, being content with what we have...all those things you have mentioned on your blog make a big difference in our marriages. God knows what is best!

Can I get an Amen?