Ephesians 5:33b: And the wife should respect her husband.
Respect is his primary need, his deepest desire.

I Put My Followers First

Monday, May 24, 2010

Respecting the Differences

One of the most important things that I have learned in life is this;

Men and women are different; fundamentally different. As soon as I began to respect my husband for being a man (and stopped trying to change him) wonderful things began to happen.

I began to accept that God wired us differently.  He did not say that man was better than woman or that woman was better than man.  God only said that it was not good for man to be alone.  God created Eve and God said, THEN, that it was good.

When I met my husband it was obvious that he was starving for respect.  He had been belittled and put down by nearly every person that he had ever loved and yet, he was willing to take another chance.  It was so simple.  I began to appreciate him.  I became his number one fan.  Most importantly, I remained his number one fan after we married.  I practice new ways - new routines, if you will - to cheer him on.  I look for opportunities to encourage him.  If he is reluctant to try something new I reach into his past and call to his mind his successes.

It has taken me over half a century to accept that men are men and women are women - and there is nothing fundamentally wrong with either one!   My husband did not seem to have any need, compulsion or desire to change me.  I was accepted and appreciated.   Once I was able to allow him to be him and to respect and appreciate who he is - as a man - wonderful things began to happen.

It would be so wonderful to spend another half century respecting and enjoying the differences.

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Can I get an Amen?